by Ron Medeiros
© MakeshiftDarkroom.com 2013
Posted 12/24/13

Some of my earliest childhood memories are still clearly resident in my mind. I was a recent arrival back then, having been in the world for only a few years. Now that's something to ponder, Once we did not exist (except in the mind of God) and then we came into being and were born into this world. We are in one sense temporal, but from God's perspective eternal. "Before I formed thee in the belly I knew thee" (Jeremiah 1:5) What a gift from God our life is! I can still remember certain things back when I was just old enough to explore and comprehend the world around me. Everything was a brand new experience. I was seeing, and hearing, and smelling, and tasting, and touching life for the first time. There were so many things to discover and comprehend. I remember when I was old enough to eat at the table with a fork and spoon; and that one of the most fascinating vegetables was what I used to call "broken trees" (broccoli). I remember when I was old enough to play out in the yard - walking through the green grass and seeing flowers and bugs. I can remember exploring my grandfather's garden where I would walk through the well kept rows, and eat cherry tomatoes off the vine. I remember going "down cellar" with my grandfather, when he would store a load of potatoes as seed for planting in the spring. The cellar was filled with the strong odor of moldy potatoes. I can remember his patient kindness as he helped me down and then up the old wooden staircase that had one step missing. "Good boy," he said, as he helped me over the gap. To me, it was like crossing a small gorge. I remember exploring my grandfather's garage with all of the different things hanging on the walls. That was where we kept my toy "trucks," when I wasn't playing with them in the sand box. My grandfather made the sand box for me, beside the garage, and he filled it with two barrels of sand from the back of his red pickup truck. There was an old chair in the garage for our dog Duntov to lay on. He was chained to a post outside the garage. I was a cowboy back then you know, and Duntov was my faithful horse - I mean dog.

It wasn't all fun though, the world was also a dangerous place. There were bees and hornets out there; they could come at any time, and they were more than happy to sting you. I had a run in with them on more than one occasion. The big bumble bees were the scariest to tangle with, and it was best to just get inside whenever they would show up. I knew that one day, I would have to stand my ground against the bees and many other dangers, if Duntov and I were going to explore the woods and fields where the big kids roamed.

Some of my fondest memories from those days, are of Christmas and of wintertime snow. I remember all of the colored lights at Christmas time, especially the lights on the Christmas tree. The silver strands of tinsel and all of the shiny and glittering ornaments and presents were a captivating sight to behold. It changed the whole mood of the living room and somehow made our home very different. I was disappointed when we "changed it back to normal" after Christmas was over. I remember the earliest winters, when I got to go out in the yard alone and play in the snow. After breakfast, my mother and grandmother would bundle me up with all of my winter clothes. I still remember those brown nylon ski pants with the loops under my feet to keep them from riding up inside my snow boots. I remember how those ski pants would make that whistling sound when I walked or ran through the snow. And I remember the snow... It was perfect and untouched, right after a fresh snowfall from the night before. I was the first one to make footprints in the snow. The snow made that wonderful crunching sound under foot. I would play in the snow out in the back yard and run, and fall down, and roll around in the snow. I remember laying on my back and making snow angels... no one had to teach me to make snow angels, I just did it. I didn't know they were called snow angels. I recall the first time that I stood up, turned around, and looked down to see the angelic design in the snow. "Wow!" I proceeded to cover the back yard with snow angels wherever I could find a patch of untouched snow. My grandmother would let Duntov out to run in the snow. He would play in the snow with me, and I would throw snow on him. I remember how it wouldn't be long until I was soaking wet, and would have to come in and dry my clothes. We had a long radiator under the window in the "back room" that was perfect for drying wet clothes. My grandmother would put my clothes, socks, and boots on the radiator, and I would watch cartoons for a few hours while my clothes dried. When they were dry, she would help me get dressed, and I would go out and do it all over again.

As I think back to those years, and the proceeding years that followed, I also recall how seldom it was that God was mentioned. The "grown ups" hardly ever mentioned his name, and no one ever told me about him. To hear the grown ups talk and live their lives, you would think that there was no such thing as God. Maybe that was because they didn't know about God either. Maybe that was because their parents never told them about God. That kind of thing can really get out of hand. As a result, I didn't relate to God or associate him with any of my experiences. Life, as I knew it then, seemed to have nothing to do with him, and he seemed to have nothing to do with life. I didn't know why I was here, or why the world was the way it was. I didn't know who God was, or what he was like, or what he had done. I didn't know that he had made every one of the snow flakes. "Hast thou entered into the treasures of the snow?" (Job 28:32a) I didn't know that as I was standing over the snow angels I had made, a guardian angel was standing over me. "For he shall give his angels charge over thee, to keep thee in all thy ways." (Psalm 91:11) I didn't know that God had been there all the time - watching and waiting patiently for the day when he would reveal himself to me. I didn't know that In my weakness and helpless state I was safe because of a perfectly prepared plan. I didn't know that a strong savior had gone before me to secure the way of salvation for my eternal soul. I didn't know that by a sovereign election of grace he had chosen me for himself. I didn't know, but would one day learn, that God was very much involved with the life of a an insignificant little boy, from a broken home.

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